A candle in your…

I want to say categorically that I won’t comment on any of these silly rumours that have been going around about Bryan Adams and I. It’s all just so embarrassing.

Sitting in my kitchen this morning I’ve been helping Rainbow, who has decided she needs to candle her ear. Now, before I go any further I have to say that I miss heard that when first she talked to me about her ear candles.

“Why would anyone put a candle in their…”

“No, Fiona! It’s ear candling! You know, using a candle to clean out your ear. Besides, if I was going to do that, I’m not sure I’d be asking for your help!”

“Why do you want to candle your ear then?” I asked, in all innocence.

“I had an abusive phone call,” said Rainbow.

“Who from?” I replied.

“The Crisis Line,” she said and then added, “They were very unkind. I just want to wash them out of my ears completely. They said I was a waste of their time. Jerry said I mustn’t speak to him again.”

“You know them on a first name basis?” I asked.

“It was very insulting. There should be a law about people calling and being so rude.”

“I thought they didn’t do outbound calls at the crisis line.”