The Crossdresser’s Workplace Phrasebook — Part 3.

Part 3. (Find part 1 here).

I have found that from time to time my physical appearance has garnered the attention of work colleagues. These days the workplace is much more regulated than once it was. Dipping one’s pen in the company ink is about as outdated as, well, the company having ink.

However, this yoga hardened body of mine appreciates the occasional lascivious glance sent its way. I admit this isn’t very ‘woke’ of me, but then I am an old-fashioned kind of crossdressing gal. I don’t do all this work on my body just so that no one notices. If. when I bend over to retrieve a dropped lace handkerchief. I don’t get at least one guilty glance at my yoga pants then I am doing something very wrong.

All that said, I was somewhat surprised the other day by something that happened at the agency. I was preparing to move offices, as luck would have it. My recent promotion to Moral Officer requires me to have a category B7 office — which should include at least 30% of the windows to be south facing, thus eliminating the seasonal depression so familiar to all those losers who are B6 or below, on account of sunlight deprivation.

Indeed since it’s been realised that the less natural light one experiences, the more likely one is to suffer depression, human resources departments the world over have had to re look at how offices are allocated to staff. It was, for example, suggested that staff might be incentivized to progress up the career ladder by offering certain departments more sunlight in their offices according to their contribution to corporate revenue. This is why computer departments are generally in the basement of office blocks, and marketing departments are invariably on the south or south west side of a building thus guaranteeing more daylight.

It was to be expected that our previous human resources manager should have misinterpreted this information. Somehow he managed to get it so muddled up in his head that he sent a memo out to all heads of department warning them that the company would in future be implementing a policy to punish poorly performing departments by reducing the amount of sunlight they’d be allowed access to, and this should be expected to induce mental deterioration and depression, and that this should serve as…