What Superhero are you for Halloween?

“So, wait a minute,” I said, scratching my head. “You want me to dress up as a sexy cowboy who is actually a woman impersonating a man?”

“Yes!” said Sylvester enthusiastically.

“Sylvester, you have met me, haven’t you? Do you know nothing of my journey?”

Like a typical man Sylvester then tried to claim that this was ok, because it’s all about inclusivity and a woman doing a man’s job. And how if I was a man I would know this. And then he went quiet and realised he was speaking aloud.

Sometimes there’s so much wrong with what comes out of the coarse oick’s mouths I just don’t know where to begin.

I looked at the advertisement again, and said, “You can really be quite coarse at times, Sylvester.”

And then quietly added, “I could just bite that ass though.”

You can buy the outfit the pervert had in mind here — https://amzn.to/3CtNh0S

I handed Sylvester a large bowl of Brazil nuts, and some pliers.

“Make yourself useful, won’t you?” I said. “I need you to shell these, with those big strong manly hands of yours.”

Sylvester sat at the kitchen table and started removing the shells of the beautiful nuts.